Contrary to what many parents and grandparents think, in 2013 it is no longer acceptable or successful to just barge in to a business location and hand them your resume, expecting them to give you a job. I’m not trying to work at Footlocker or CVS, I’m trying to build a career people! Additionally, the resume you have now is probably not good enough, no matter how many internships you have listed. They (who are “they” anyway?) say employers only look at a job seeker’s resume for 3-10 seconds before knowing if they’re a dud, and I always thought: “Well I don’t have any typos and I have a good GPA, that’s good enough!” Unfortunately, that’s not the way it is, fellow naïve job seekers.

I’m giving myself time to read through each book I have and complete the exercises the authors suggest, and I’m actually finding out a lot about myself in the process. There is so much that I didn’t know, and so much that I will need to continue to do even after a land a job. I’m in the process of rebranding myself—meaning I need to change my LinkedIn profile’s information and summary, my blog information, and all of my social media accounts to reflect the profession I want to pursue. I’m flabbergasted that not many of my friends who are looking for jobs know that these branding techniques are key to landing a “dream job.”

With each book I read, each exercise I complete, and each new word I use to describe myself, I’m building my confidence and marketability to a future employer. I hope my fellow job seekers can read this and know that it is completely worth it (and necessary) to figure out what you REALLY want to do before you start electronically applying to every entry-level position on CareerBuilder.com and inevitably getting interviews only for sketchy sales positions or pyramid schemes. Good luck to us all, and I hope I don’t eat these words one day

Here is a list of the books I’m reading:

Branding Yourself: How to Use Social Media to Invent or Reinvent Yourself by Erik Deckers and Kyle Lacy

The No Excuse Guide to Success: No Matter What Your Boss—or Life—Throws at You by Jim Smith, Jr.

LinkedIn Makeover: Professional Secrets to a Powerful LinkedIn Profile by Donna Serdula

Get the Job You Want Even When No One’s Hiring by Ford R. Myers

What Color is Your Parachute?: A Practical Manual for Job Hunters and Career Changers by Richard N. Bolles

It was recently pointed out that a friend only talks about herself and will interrupt someone midsentence to talk about herself whether it’s relevant to the conversation or not. This made me unbelievably self-conscious about how often I do the same and how often my friends do it, too. I wish it had never been brought up, but now that it has, it’s time to bring it to your attention as well!

I challenge you to start having conversations without saying anything about yourself. Don’t interrupt to add in about how you understand or had a similar experience or agree, just listen and ask the person how he/she is feeling/thinking/etc. You might feel like you’re interrogating your friend or being super nosy, but you’ll finally be listening for once in your life instead of being completely self-absorbed. Make it a habit. There will be uncomfortable pauses when you’re tempted to use a personal pronoun, but use that pause to allow your friend to continue talking about his/her day. Isn’t it sad that this is even challenging?

It’s time to get over yourself. Your awesome/mediocre/awful idea/day/test/meal/boyfriend isn’t actually something people want to hear about whenever they are in your presence. Stop talking and start listening and you’ll be surprised about how much you’ve been missing.

PS-There were six personal pronouns used in this 350-word article on a personal blog, not including the five listed for clarification on what counts as a personal pronoun. It’s possible to get over yourself.

In my sorority we are often reminded “To receive much, you must give much.” I was giving and giving and giving, but never receiving anything at all…not even a thank you. I figured out it was because I surrounded myself with people who weren’t truly my friends and were selfish in the way we usually imagine selfish people to act. One person would only contact me when she wanted something; never to ask how I’m doing, just to get information from me that would benefit her. Others simply only care about themselves and speaking about themselves and relating everything to themselves. Is that really someone I want to help out, or even associate with regularly? No.

I used to feel obligated to help anyone, even if they didn’t ask. If I saw someone who was using incorrect grammar or didn’t know where to start with networking, I would go ahead and let them know out of the goodness of my heart. But one thing I learned in school about networking is that you need to build beneficial relationships for both parties. It doesn’t need to be equal in grandeur, just that I won’t be sucked dry from resources with nothing in return to assure me that I wasn’t taken for granted (I probably am).

This year, I’m saying “no.” I’m not making excuses for why I don’t want to or can’t go somewhere, I just say, “I don’t want to go” and my friends aren’t offended. If someone asks for advice, I give it without looking up minute details about their particular situation. I started generalizing.

I know that in order to help others, I must first help myself. I’m in a vulnerable place in my life without a steady income or an idea of what the hell I’m going to do once I graduate in May. Once I’m in a comfortable place financially and physically, I’ll start lending out resources to my friends, who will at that point actually be the kind of people I won’t even think twice about helping out of the goodness of my heart. But I might just be a narcissistic 20-something who is completely self absorbed…and I’m ok with that.

I decided that in order to delay real personhood, I would get a Master’s degree. Well, my friends, it seems I will graduate this May, thus being thrust into real personhood quicker than I thought. So what if I gave myself two extra years? I still don’t feel ready to do the same thing all day, every day, for the rest of my life, or even to figure out what that thing is and how long it will take before I go insane from doing it all day, every day, for the rest of my life.

Like most unemployed college graduates and those closing in on the end of their college careers, I sit on job search sites (name it, I’ve got an account), looking at the thousands of posts thinking “Is this for me?,” “Am I actually qualified for this?,” and “Will this job drive me insane after X months?” as I click through the scarce intriguing job titles. I’m frustrated with friends/family/strangers pushing what they think I should go into as a career, asking why it’s taken me so long to find something (?!), and comparing me with their situations (“Well, when I was 23…”).

I still haven’t found my life’s calling, even with those two extra cushion years and a few thousand more in debt piling up in cyber calculation math space. I’m even more confused now, and unlike so many people (“No matter what job you have, you’re going to hate it!”), I don’t want to be depressed each morning I wake up and realize it’s still a part of my “work week.” Is that what becoming a real person means? Being sad/depressed/angry all the time?

To quote Steve Jobs, “The only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle.“ I’m going to go ahead and do as Steve recommended and not settle on a job just because it pays the bills. I’m going to start with my Oprah “Aha!” moment when I say “OK, so I really want to do X so I can go to X and look for X,” because I don’t even have that much yet! Even though I have studied English, nutrition, and publishing, none define a job title. I’m as confused as I was when I was 17 years old, looking for 317 Stone Hall when I got off the elevator with my cart full of my most important life possessions behind me. And if I’m going on what I already know at this very moment, I’m perfectly content with being a professional student, AKA fake person, for the rest of my life. Until I Aha!, just help me push the damn cart.

Here’s my advice on what you should ask yourself before you just knock off something from your life whether it be a job, club, volunteer position, etc.:

I’ll refer to it as the quit in question (QIQ)

Am I learning anything?

Is the QIQ teaching you about leadership, responsibility, time management? Is it showing you what you don’t want to be doing with your life? Are you gaining any skills?

If yes, don’t quit.

Am I doing this for myself or for someone else?

Did you parents force you to join the QIQ? Peer pressure from your friends or significant other? Do you hate it?

If yes, you may want to quit.

What will be the repercussions in the future?

Will it prevent you from moving forward in your career if your resume showed you quit the QIQ after 6 months? Will it remove something from your resume? Ruin your reputation?

If yes, don’t quit.

Will I benefit if I stick it out?

If you stay, will you gain networking opportunities, a chance to move up, recommendations, better job prospects? Will you meet new people? Potential significant other (Hey, it’s possible!)? Learning experiences? Will it be over eventually anyway?

If yes, don’t quit

How much have I put into it?

Have you devoted lots of time, effort, and money to the QIQ? And by lots I mean hours and hours a day/week and more than $300 a semester.

If yes, this is life. Don’t quit. You’ll find this happens in any and every situation.

How will I supplement it if I quit?

If the QIQ is a job, where will you get money? If it’s an organization/club, what will you put on your resume instead? If it’s an internship, where will you gain experience? What will you do with your time?

If “I don’t know,” don’t quit.

Think about these questions seriously before you quit. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Well, when I was browsing Pinterest one day, I stumbled upon a post promising those fantastic results across your ENTIRE (!) face! Naturally I had to try it.

The post was about using a gelatin/milk mixture and pulling it off like a face mask.

Here is my review of the entire situation:

1. It smells HORRIBLE. I would say it’s a mixture of vomit/urine/baby poop
2. It will rip off your skin.

I should have quit after mixing the stuff and getting hit in the face with the stench. But no, I’m not a quitter! I wanted my pores cleansed, dammit!

I waited about 30 minutes for the thing to dry. The site says 15-ish or until it feels hard enough. I tried to remove after 20, but some spots were still a little wet. I figured it would peel off like Elmer’s glue when you would let it dry on the palm of your hand in elementary school. It was a sad result.

After 15 minutes of trying to get some sheets of the mixture off my face, I gave up and started literally scraping at my face with my nails. I felt like a crazy person, but it was getting harder and more painful with every minute I left it on my face. I was determined to have the promised results and to not just give up and wet my face. Well, my opinion soon changed and I resorted to washing my face in the sink to get the gunk off.

This was my face after:

not normal

This was my face 15 minutes after:

Still disturbing

Results:

My face is, quite frankly, as smooth as a baby’s bottom like she said. It is also red and splotchy as if I had some sort of chemical or allergic reaction. It’s also tingling and burning. It’s been about 45 minutes since I got everything off my face.

Only then did I decide to check out the comments a little more thoroughly on the original post. Others noted the smell and that it was too harsh on their skin. Oops on my part.

My advice? Read reviews from other people before you engage in a Pinterest activity involving your body. Seems simple enough, but I think there are many others out there who don’t read directions before attempting to assemble something so they will likely not read reviews either (like me). I don’t think I’ll be trying this one again.

Happy pinning!

WRONG. This was hands-down the most painful dessert-making experience I’ve ever had. OK, maybe I’m being a little dramatic, but it’s definitely the worst in my recent memory.

Seems simple enough: make some Rice Krispie treats, flatten them onto a cookie sheet or two, put your candy (Swedish Fish, gummy worms, Twizzlers) in the middle, and fold it up like sushi. Then wrap it in fun Fruit Rollups (Fruit by the Foot was much easier) and cut it up like they do at the restaurant! Except they don’t mention the almost-impossible task of keeping the “sushi” stuck together and the cutting into individual rolls.

I had a number of meltdowns while rolling the sushi, as it was either too thick or too thin. Forget doing a massive roll like regular sushi, I had to do each one individually with one Swedish Fish, one gummy worm, and one chunk of Twizzler. I finally decided that maybe if I put it in the refrigerator, it might be more manageable. Plus it gave me time to breathe and reevaluate this life decision.

Cooling it worked! You also must mush the thing together; basically rebuilding it to keep the two ends to stick together. Well then, I thought, I might as well put all the rolls in the refrigerator before I cut them so they stay together, duh?! Wrong again, Nicole.

Once I pulled the chilled rolls out of the refrigerator, it was the MOST DIFFICULT task of cutting the rolls. I just had to cut the roll into twos or threes. AND I used my brand-new Cutco knives…that I put under hot water like the recipe said! The practically-infant child did it, and still had 10 fingers at the end… but the mother clearly Photoshopped those images, because those babies were not getting chopped without a fight. I must have thrown away nearly two pounds of Rice Krispie treats in the process. The Swedish Fish just would not budge.

Mid-cutting photograph. Note the pile of "useless" Rice Krispie Treat on the left and piles of wrappers on the right

But on the bright side, these were the finished products:

Completed Candy Sushi!

I put toothpicks through all of them because they were too sticky to pick up with your hands. And everyone said they were delicious! I did not taste them because I was so angry with them I felt they didn’t deserve to be eaten by me.

 My words of wisdom on this project:

Yes, they look super cute at the end, but do be prepared to spend upwards of 4 hours from start to finish.

Don’t use jumbo Swedish Fish! Use the little ones!

Refrigerate sheets of Rice Krispie Treats before rolling in candy

DON’T refrigerate once you roll in your candy

Fruit by the Foot is easier to wrap around the sushi, and looks better than Fruit Rollups

It is sticky, so consider putting toothpicks through each roll

See Paris from Sacré-Cœur Basilica!

1. RS: Savor every moment of your first few hours.

NG: CAPTURE every moment of your first few hours.

Take pictures of EVERYTHING AND save all your receipts, brochures, leaflets, postcards, etc. Amazing memories will rush back when you see them again! Memories that are only saved in your mind can fade but tangible mementos last forever (or until they are destroyed)!

2. RS: Embrace the prospect of being a tourist.

NG: Embrace the culture and do as the locals do!

Don’t do what tour guides say. Venture off the beaten path to get a more realistic experience. When in a foreign country, or another US city, I always get so sick of being around other tourists and honestly, I feel like I look like an idiot. It’s so adventurous and makes for a better story when you go down a back road and find a random hole-in-the-wall restaurant.

3. RS: Devour the hotel literature.

NG: Ask a local.

You had plenty of time (maybe) to brush up on all the travel guides before your trip. Now find out the juicy secrets from locals. Just don’t be a typical, annoying American tourist. Be insightful and ask questions!

The Churchill Arms pub in Notting Hill (& me)

4. RS: Run an errand for a friend.

NG: Meet a new friend.

Spark a conversation with a person in the grocery store. Meet up with local chapter members from a national organization you belong to. You’re bound to have connections anywhere in the world. Use your networking skills!

5. RS: Take in a performance or a sporting event.

NG: Do what you’ve always wanted.

Screw others people’s opinions of what you HAVE to do in a city. Say you’ve never been to a performance of Wicked, and there’s one going on that night in central London—DO IT. Don’t just go to something because you feel obligated, especially if it ends up being a flop you’ll have an even more sour taste in your mouth.

6. RS: Check out a bookstore.

NG: Check out a Starbucks.

Especially if you’re feeling homesick, definitely hit up Starbucks. I have yet to visit a city that doesn’t have one. You’ll feel at home and little more comfortable striking up conversation with the barista about information on the area.

Starbucks in Berlin, Germany

7. RS: Ride a bus to the end of the line.

NG: Ride a bus to another town.

The end of the bus line could take you to the ghetto…where you will NOT enjoy your time. Pick a town outside the city and visit! I did this in Brussels with my friend Emily. We visited Bruges and it was absolutely gorgeous and quaint. Too bad we didn’t know people spoke Flemish there so we were corrected and felt like idiots saying “Oui.” I also did this with my Aunt Janine and cousin Jayda in London (we went to the Cotswolds) and friends Mo and Kendra in Berlin (we went to Oranienburg). It’s much more memorable and extremely BEAUTIFUL!

Me and Emily hanging out in Bruges

8. RS: Read the daily newspaper.

NG: Save the daily newspaper

Don’t just read it and toss it—keep it forever. You’ll probably forget you were in Rome Nov. 1, 2010 (okay, that was my 21^st birthday so I’ll never forget), but having the newspaper will remind you of both the date and local occurrences that day.

9. RS: Go to McDonald’s.

NG: Get Chinese food.

Don’t be the stereotypical fat-ass American and go to McDonald’s, hit up a Chinese restaurant instead. Again, I did this a lot when I was studying abroad and visiting many countries. It’s a mixture of comforting and exciting—you kind of know what it’s going to be, but not really.

Eating Chinese cuisine in Brussels, Belgium

10. RS&NG: Get lost.

Well, okay I agree with this. I can honestly say I don’t remember a single museum or cathedral/church I visited in Barcelona in 2006 (Wait…was it 2005??), but I can definitely recall getting lost with Emily and talking to random street vendors and locals in my broken, horrible Spanish. We eventually found our high school tour group after a few hours, and you will certainly get back to wherever you need to be…eventually.

DO NOT BE SHY! Explore!

For more photos from my adventures, check out my Flickr account.

The finished product!

W25 1/2in. X H78in. X D11 1/4in. 72 compartments each can hold one shoe or a pair shoes depending on the size of the shoe.

Materials:

• 2 pieces of 1” thick pine x 12” wide x 6’ 6” long (for the sides)
• 2 pieces of 1” thick pine x 12” wide x 25.5” long (for the top and bottom)
• One piece of ¼” plywood 25.5” x 6’ 7” (for the back of the unit)
• 2 4’ x 8’ sheets of 1/4” plywood (for the slats)
• (4 qty) Vertical slats: 12” x 6’6”
• (12 qty) Horizontal slats: 12” x 25”
• Wood glue
• 1 5/8” wood screws

Optional: 4 furniture legs for decorative footings on bottom of the unit

Directions:

1. Go to a home improvement store, and ask for the above dimensions to be cut for you from the materials
2. Build the box by assembling the sides and top into a box and secure the back with wood screws and glue
3. Cut 4 slits, evenly spaced, halfway through the long side every 6 ¼” apart for the horizontal slats
4. Cut 12 slits, evenly spaced, halfway through the long side every 6 ½” apart for the vertical slats
5. Take 1 horizontal and 1 vertical slat
1. Weave the horizontal and vertical slits together by first sliding 1 horizontal slat through all 4 vertical slats, then weave the rest of the horizontal slats through
6. Insert the assembled slats into the box (You can secure with glue, but I did not and the weight of my shoes holds everything in place)
7. Attach furniture legs to the bottom corners of the unit for decorative purposes (we made our own)
8. Lightly sand and stain to match your existing furniture and then a coat of polyurethane to seal

Looking intrigued...

Heels over 5" won't fit more than one in a slot...and have to be put in sideways!

Note: You can adjust the dimensions to meet your needs/space restrictions

Caused by: Jergen's Natural Glow Express

Caused by: Jergen's Natural Glow Express

Or tried a spray tan and your tub/feet look like this?

Caused by: Sally Spray Tan Kit

Or you realize 2 hours before you’re supposed to go out that you’re extremely pale and NEEEED to be tan?

I have the solution.

I’ve FINALLY found an excellent way to apply self tanner that is quick, easy, and practically fool proof: Fake Bake Flawless Self-Tan Lotion

You spray it on, and you get an INSTANT tan. It comes with a brown mitt, and you spray the product directly on your body (except your face) and rub it in with the mitt. For your face, spray on the mitt, and then use it for your face.

You can see exactly where Fake Bake has been applied and where it clearly hasn’t. Even if you miss a spot in the first application and it dries, you can easily blend it in. Fake Bake also dries within minutes, and you can reapply to get the desired tan.

Terrible lighting, but this is my "before shot" although I had applied the product the day before

This is what it looks like when you first spray Fake Bake on your skin and before you rub it in

You can see where I applied and where I didn't (the darker area!) after I rubbed it in with the mitt

So far, I’ve used it 4 times since I purchased it (once each weekend). Here is a list of pros and cons I’ve found when using the product:

Pros:
• Immediate results
• Easily removed-from both body and hands
• Great color
• Bottle of product lasts a long time
• Stays on even when you sweat a bit
• Avoid the case of awkward brown feet/palms of hands
Cons:
• Comes off with water (CAUTION: APPLY AFTER YOU BRUSH YOUR TEETH OR YOU WILL BE STREAKING DOWN YOUR CHIN…EW)
• Bottle gets messy
• Tan only lasts until your next shower
• My face (especially nose) gets brown even when I use only the tiniest bit

In short, I would NOT recommend this product if you’re going to be attending a pool party, because as soon as you get wet, it comes off and it’s brown! Otherwise, Fake Bake is really awesome if you don’t have time to wait for a spray tan or lotions to take effect.

Fake Bake is great for a night out and photographs flawlessly! I rarely have streaks or blotches and use it often; I will be tossing my lotion in exchange for this product.